Topic 2: Service to Others

A person’s desire and ability to serve and to understand others is the third important social competence skill. Orientation in service to others means:

• understanding the needs of people and directing them to the possibilities for satisfying them;
• offering appropriate assistance;
• counseling and offering ideas that develop the strengths and skills of others;
• confirmation and rewarding the strengths, achievements, and the development of others;
• giving positive feedback and identifying people’s needs for development.

The focus on giving/helping others is also very good for our own emotional well-being. To be socially intelligent we need to develop the habit of giving, not only money, but time, kindness, attention, love etc. Imagine you find 10 Euro on the street. Are you going to be happier if you spend it for yourself or for other people? Research shows that 63% of people think that they would be happier if they spend the money on themselves. But in reality, those spending on other people have much better chance to be in a good mood during the whole day and to be happy. However, it is important to practice it with measure, so as not to burden yourselves. If you overdo sympathising with others and answering to their needs, you might exhaust yourselves. While you take care of the emotions and problems of others, you have to care for your own emotional well-being and balance.