Topic 7: Strategies to Take Back Control Over Our Emotions

  • First thing we should do is take a few deep breaths (7 – 10) and concentrate our mind on the breath. Very often this will be enough, because it will give us the necessary time.

For example by doing some of the following:

  • step back or step aside (and breath and focus on breathing)
  • evaluate: how angry/disappointed I am on the scale from 1 to 10
  • use your imagination: mentally going outside the situation by for example giving animal names or theatre roles and evaluating how well they play it
  • In situations like this, watching television or listening to music can help in distracting us from anger provoking thoughts. Sports, talking or phoning, can also be of help.

Source: Pixabay

  • Just the simple act of finding a name for the way we feel provokes our rational mind to take over. Think: What do I feel now? For example, “I am angry”. This is a powerful tool to lower the strength of the feelings and emotions in order to be able to better control your behaviour.
  • e.g. the self-generating ear: what does the sender reveal about himself/herself?  Is he or she bored, just wants to provoke, unhappy?
  • Try to progressively relax your muscles. Remember that the way you behave influences your feelings. Unclench you jaw and fists, stop the nervous thumping with your leg. Relax your brows, stop frowning. Relax your shoulders and neck.